Editorial: A gun battle worth fighting
I
can’t bear to turn on my TV, look something up on the Internet, or flip open
the daily newspaper. They are everywhere: heartbreaking stories, powerful
villains, and brokenhearted families. Violence is ever-present in our world
right now. The crimes, killings, and heartbreak are impossible to ignore. This
fact multiplies the debates over guns that are circling through the country.
This editorial uses details, diction, and imagery to negate guns and ignite an
emotional response in every reader.
By
using real facts that touch the reader’s heart such as “[we live] in a nation
where an Oregon mall shooting amid thousands of Christmas shoppers is nearly
forgotten just three days later, swallowed into oblivion by another, much
larger mass shooting” the author is able to convey their point while evoking
emotion. Most everyone agrees, “we don’t [want] to accept children shot on our
streets week after week or rampaging gunman terrorizing theaters and schools”
and that we should “do more to keep guns from people with a mental illness.”
With their use of relatable, true, extreme details, the author makes it close
to impossible for the reader not to agree with his or her point. By using such
details, the author touches the readers’ heart and starts a fire of anger and sadness
inside of them.
At
the same time, the author uses forceful diction to further prove their point.
They use words that are very unique and appropriate to the context. For
example, they say we are “ [tiptoeing]” around gun laws and call the gun-law “challenge”
“insurmountable.” The author does a phenomenal job of using diction to
emphasize his or her points and really touch the reader. When talking about the
poor victims they use words like “terrorizing” and “swallowed into oblivion.”
Every phrase and word about guns and violence has a very powerful, negative
connotation.
While
using emotion provoking details and diction, the author uses intense imagery to
create vivid pictures in the reader’s mind. The thought of “a horrific shooting at a Connecticut
elementary school that left 27 dead, including 20 children” makes any person
cringe with disgust. The vision of “children shot on our streets week after
week” and “a rampaging gunman terrorizing theaters and schools” ignites a
emotional, angry response. With their use of such powerful imagery, the author
hits a sensitive spot in any reader.
By
using details, diction, and imagery to ignite emotion in readers, the author
successful negated guns. They were able to target sensitivity in the reader and
use that to prove their point.
Hi Sam!
ReplyDeleteDon't forget to link your article to your post :)
I think your introduction is gripping, interesting, and flows into the following paragraphs nicely. A suggestion that I have for your thesis sentence is to describe details, diction, and imagery more to make it more specific to your close reading. For example, saying "thought provoking details" rather than just details might be more specific. I guess it's more of a personal taste thing, but I think it would make your thesis sentence stronger because all authors use DIDLS to write.
Maybe you could have a stronger conclusion as well. I think you have great supporting details and powerful examples straight from the text to support your statements. I can tell you put a lot of time into this because it flows nicely and has lots of examples.
Joyce
Hey Sam,
ReplyDeleteI thought you did a great job finding supporting details in your post! One thing that you should put in are citations although I'm not sure how important they are. You have really good supporting paragraphs, but I think you can make your thesis a bit meatier. You could flesh out how the author used everything like Joyce said. Holmes really stresses the importance of the thesis so that's just one thing to think about. Also you might want to say specifically what emotions the author elicits from the reader. Overall, good post!
We wrote about the same article! (speaking of which, I fixed my blog so you can see the closed prompt now)
ReplyDeleteLink to article for future reference:http://www.suntimes.com/opinions/17012491-474/editorial-a-gun-battle-worth-fighting.html
Anyhow, great work using textual evidence in your essay. The next step is to expand your warrants. Explain how the author uses the text in your evidence to do what he/she does. Sure a word has negative connotation, but what does that do? A good strategy is to pick out at least one of your pieces of evidence and show how it is used to the author's advantage.
Noah Symanzik